I guarantee you that life will be beautiful again, my darling girl.
There are long drives to make, while your thoughts have time to explore their bounds.
You will say goodnight to the sun, over and over.
You will watch the sky turn to fire, after the sun slowly dips below the horizon,
And you will say yes to a first date, only to bravely set boundaries and say ‘no’ to a second.
So get yourself up off that shower floor. Step out of that shower, dry your tears and wipe the mascara from below your eyes. Don’t abandon the calling on your life - make a choice.
View this post on InstagramA post shared by Angela | Resilience Educator (@outdoor.angventures) on
Over the last few years I was reunited with myself, as if being reacquainted with an old friend, from whom I'd grown distant.
I had to learn what sort of music I enjoy, my preference for movies and type of travel, what I need from friendships and within a romantic relationship.
I've learned what makes my soul sing, what excites me and what scares me. I've learned I'm not as afraid as I once thought. In fact, I actually thrive when I choose to face my fears to embrace new experiences, rather than cower behind my doubts.
Somewhere along the way, I lost touch with myself. I often want to blame it on marrying young, an ex with a dominant personality and my tendency to people please. Yet, further examination shows it began way before that.
While memories from the last two decades show my tendencies to meld to societal expectations, my mom has been sharing with me that I was once her most adventurous child (of 4). I loved cold mountain streams, basking in sunlight and swimming for hours. After we moved from CO to IA, I teared up at images of mountains, aching for them. I ran everywhere, with high energy and excitement; my Dad called me "Fast Pony", a nickname my adolescent self could never understand.
Yet, around the age of 6, fear set in. I stopped being adventurous and instead became fearful, self-conscious, timid and overly shy. I equated athleticism to having a knack for organized sports and discounted my strength and flexibility as my clumsiness seemed to take more of the spotlight.
My Mom has shared she never knew how to help me get back to my adventurous self but has been delighted as it feels like she is once again seeing that little girl re-emerge. And so it turns out, rather than discovering new interests, I've actually been peeling back the layers to reunite with my innermost self. 📸: @wildernesspro whose photos (and encouragement) have empowered me to see myself as the strong, adventurous, outdoorsy, badass woman that I previously never pictured myself capable of, in environments I never dreamt I'd experience. Thank you for helping me see myself ❤
